First, we are so excited to be showing at Horror Realm in Pittsburgh this weekend! I will be doing my usual stock of flower crowns, tarot readings, posters and the lovely Mae March will be selling books containing her amazing short stories! If you’re in the Pittsburgh area, come stop by and talk to us!
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Some communication skills can go a long way in business.
It was the second week of employment and she was already starting to overstep her bounds. Allison was hired in as a sales representative and that meant, mostly, selling group rates, renting out meeting rooms, and being attractive enough to attend conventions where the hotel needed to be represented. There was paperwork and there were phone calls and travel dues, all of which could be spent inside the relative privacy of her five-by-ten office.
Which begs the question: why was she taking up valuable space at the front desk?
It is both stressful and exciting! Its… stressciting! No… extressful. That sounds more like a real word. But! In any case. If you’re in the Chicago area and you’re bored and you want to come see me and the lovely, lovely Liz Holzer (being adorable together), we’ll be Table 15! I’ll be doing tarot readings, as usual, and Liz will be selling prints and I believe she’s also doing plushes.
If you’ve got an affinity for the strange and if you’re in South Bend, IN on May 24th, come see me at The State Theatre for Bizarre Coterie. There will be live bands, burlesque shows, all sorts of live acts on stage in addition to tons of local Michiana artists. I will be doing tarot readings and selling my art and mostly just hanging out and being fabulous all night long. Help out some local folks and have a good time. Admission is $3, which will be donated to The Music Village. For more information and to see other artists that are attending, come see the Facebook Page.
Me and the lovely, lovely Mad Mae March will be sharing a table with Kerry Giantsquid Lipp March 7-9 at Horror Realm! I’ll be selling prints, comics (if they get here in time) and doing tarot readings. Kerry will be promoting some of his written stuff and Mae will be doing whatever it is she’s doing these days, which is mostly looking her fantastic self.
Come see us, have your fortune read, buy some prints, talk about books and heads exploding or just bask in our hellish glow.
Be there or be… well, its not so much a square as it is something that’s pointedly not round. I… I think its a trapezoid slowly rotating in the deep, dark abyss…
Where was I? Oh yes. Here’s Horror Realm’s website.
If you need something to do on Valentine’s Day that isn’t hoarding gold to make into a roost (no wait. That’s dragons. Dragons do that.) I will be at The State Theater in South Bend, selling art and doing tarot readings. Of course, I’m not the main feature: there’s going to be a bunch of bands and some dance acts there as well. The show is called My Bloody Valentine and we’ve got tons of other local artists. That’s The State Theater in downtown South Bend. Admission is $3 a person, $5 for a couple, doors open at 7 pm and close at 1am. And if you’re a dragon and you’re reading this- this applies to you, too. Feel free to take human form and mingle.
There’s just something about those blondes.
Men lust after blondes. This is a simple fact, proven by centuries of literature and crass jokes on this very subject. What is not so simple is that blondes, much like beers, each come in unique flavors. The science of such of simplifying such a thing has been attempted by cosmetic companies in the form of hair dye, but the art is making them appealing enough to fly off the shelves. The simplest way to do that is through names. They try their hardest to sell blondes as food: honey blonde, strawberry blonde, wheat blonde, caramel. If its not food, its luxury: platinum, golden, champagne.
Blondes are flavors and money.
Secrets will be the death of him.
She was a little house mouse: with her straight brown hair and her unflattering dress. That was also brown, but I could never tell the difference between plaid, paisley, and floral. It was brown. All she ever wore was brown so that she could tell when there was a speck of flour or sugar and meticulously pick it off with her nervously chewed fingernails.
Frosty the Snowman got an upgrade.
He said that he would be back, and I thought at the time that it was just simple threats. Or I fooled myself into believing that the words of the truly mad were nothing but empty promises. For all intents and purposes he appeared gone, and I took small comfort in the fact that perhaps he was gone for good.
Here is a less than 200-word piece that is so completely innocuous and yet has gotten me in heaps of trouble because evidently it is ‘evangelism.’
“If you’re a witch,” the man said, “then make your glass move.” He indicated the glass to her left, which used to hold soda but now only ice. The restaurant was hardly a poor choice, but this attempted ‘blind date’ had left her rather with a sour taste in her mouth. Still, she refused to leave and let him feel that he’d made his point when she had her own to make.